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Regis Auffray

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Member Since: Sep, 2002

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Featured Book
Book 3: The Nublis Chronicles: The Wages of Greed
by Kate Saundby

Concubine's son, illegal witch child, consummate trader for a world in bondage. On Nublis he proved his worth. But the prophecy was only that one would be born who might ..  
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Books by Regis Auffray
Ostrich Ride and other Tales
by Regis Auffray
Thursday, August 27, 2015
Rated "G" by the Author.
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Recent poems by Regis Auffray
•  Miss Understood
•  Petrichor
•  Limericks XXXVII
•  My Hands
•  I Wish I Could Tell You...
           >> View all 359

Just for the fun of limericks...

Ostrich Ride and other Tales

There once was a gal named Loris,
Who had a pet ostrich named Morris;
It was rather smart,
It could pull a cart,
It pulled Loris all the way to Paris.
A man in a boat on a pond,
Fell head over heels for a blonde;
She seemed sweet and sassy,
And really quite classy,
Too late he realized he'd been conned.
I know a fine lady named Lee,
Who works most diligently;
At Canadian Tire,
Every single buyer,
Loves Lee most definitely.
She's a lovely lady the Moon,
She makes many a lover swoon;
She's faithful and true ,
Like a favourite brew,
She's a peach in December or June.
There once was a plumber named Perry,
Many thought that he was from Paree;
Though he spoke no French,
He was good with his wrench,
According to a gal called Marie.
There once was an ape named Harry,
Who was tall and dark and hairy;
But he played the piano,
With his friend Cyrano,
Together they made folks merry.
There's a lad in our gym called Kevin,
To this fellow floor hockey is heaven;
He captains our team,
With a great deal of steam,
And he scores not seven but ten times seven.
Three fellows, Wynken, Blynken, and Nod,
Went sailing to fish for some cod;
But they fell asleep,
Their boat sank in the deep,
And they woke up in the house of God.
There’s a fine lady from New York,
Who is anything but a dork;
She’s smart and she’s pretty,
She’s Lena not Betty,
And her hands have a great deal of torque.
There once was a lady called Callie,
Who lived in the valley with Nallie;
What they did down there,
Was take care of a bear,
That Callie and Nallie named Sally.
© Copyright 2015 Regis Auffray
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Reviewed by John Herlihy 9/1/2015
It's number one, Regis, for a reason. A real joy ride indeed. Many thanks. John
Reviewed by Thomasena Martin-Johnson 8/31/2015
Regis, I loved it. You had me laughing out loud. I agree with Jerry.
Love and smiles.
Reviewed by audrine max 8/31/2015
What a perfect way
To start your day
Read some poetry
By Regis Auffray..
Reviewed by Mary Ann Biddinger 8/31/2015
Delightful and whimsical limericks. A smile curve for the day!!

Lady Mary Ann
Reviewed by Amber Moonstone 8/31/2015
You have made me smile!! Love your limericks as always!
Peace, love and light
Reviewed by Ruan Mills Burke 8/31/2015
There was a fun poet called Auffray
Whose words always seemed to portray
According to rumour
An astute sense of humour
And a skill with some fancy word-play
Reviewed by Micki Peluso 8/30/2015
You made my day brighter!! I love your limericks. They take away the sting of life and portray its absurdity.
Reviewed by Ken Colonsay 8/30/2015
Ha ha! Reg's limericks are the dog's bollocks (that's high praise from Londoners) Pure dead brilliant! praise from Glaswegians, Dead on! from the Northern Irish, tres bien from the French. Keep 'em comin', Regis!
Reviewed by henry steven (Reader) 8/30/2015
Excellent piece of art.
Reviewed by John Domino 8/29/2015
This one is almost Biblical!

Three fellows, Wynken, Blynken, and Nod,
Went sailing to fish for some cod;
But they fell asleep,
Their boat sank in the deep,
And they woke up in the house of God.

Actually Jesus fell asleep during a bad storm on a boat.
His so called friends fell asleep when he needed them most.
Perhaps that's why he gave us a spiritual guide called the Holy Ghost.

So much for my no rhyme lime-o-rick.

God Bless you!

John Michael

Reviewed by Ed Matlack 8/28/2015
I know a guy name of Reg,
Who of limericks wrote a great deal,
In him he has some french,
So could he not then make a great meal,
Actually though he is better digging a trench...

Gee I wish I knew how to write limericks... <SMILE> -e-
Reviewed by Ronald Hull 8/28/2015
The plumber is the one I adore. I can identify with diving into dark places for the filthy fun that results. Love them all, as well.

Reviewed by Walt Hardester 8/28/2015
Is this a challenge like the old days?...Yee Ha Labelle did one too today.

Reviewed by neerja gandhi 8/27/2015
They are heart touching....good hearty laughs and cries too as I miss my friend very much !!!!
Lol...aka... lots of friend used to say...and true of for goid verses brings lolssssss....
Reviewed by Sherry Heim 8/27/2015
Reviewed by Dallas D'Angelo-Gary 8/27/2015
Limmerik city! You do these very well, Regis!
Reviewed by George Carroll 8/27/2015
This is your forte, keep at it
Reviewed by Marilyn Friesen 8/27/2015
That's my smile for today :)> Just one little thought; how about 'called'in the first line since you used 'named' in the second. Your choice!
P.S. How did you get so many followers?
Reviewed by Jane Noponen Perinacci 8/27/2015
I had a good time reading these!! Thank you.

Love ya!

Reviewed by Clarence Prince 8/27/2015
Oh what a great picture,

funny must spell your middle name;

You are getting better with everything that you write yet!

Thanks for sharing!
Reviewed by Liana Margiva 8/27/2015
'Three fellows ...
went sailing to fish...
but they fell asleep,
their boat sank in the deep,
and they woke up in the house of God' ----- EXCELLENT!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!! Liana Margiva
Reviewed by Lark Pogue 8/27/2015
I was ready for this light-hearted limerick! More
Reviewed by Sandie Angel 8/27/2015
EXCELLENT tales, Regis!! I've always enjoyed your limericks!! They are a delight to read!!

Reviewed by Jerry Bolton 8/27/2015
Limerick King of Authors Den!
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Under the Coolabah Tree - Audio Book by Wendy Laing

Australian bush poetry - sometime bawdy, but alway fun, written in the traditional lyrical Oz bush verse style...  
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