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Erin E Kelly-Moen

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Member Since: Oct, 2002

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Quenching Thirst
by Erin E Kelly-Moen

Sunday, June 29, 2003

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I've been working on this piece for a contest. It had to have the phrase "quenching thirst in a dry county". My first thought was not alcohol related, it was living in the dryness of Arizona, so I slanted the piece in that direction, but included allusions to other spirits in the piece. :)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She had moved to a remote part of the country,
following her husbands career,
and her rebellious desire to vacate her birth state.
Wisconsin, home of cows, farmers, and beer,
gorgeous in its greenery, savage in its winters,
land of milk and cheese, fishing holes
and wild strawberries.

She pauses, in her musings, thirsting.
The shifting sands echo the blistering heat.
Mountains rear their Time-laden brows,
searching for companion clouds
to shadow the sun. Beyond the sticky haze,
a billowing amalgamates. Moisture
has set up its still, in Arizona.

Memories of flowing water, tadpole marveling,
grumbling disregard for rainy days, permeates
the very air she breathes, marking the extent
of her attrition. At times, she is Nuance.
Lips dry, shifting emotional equilibrium,
throat aching for intoxicating libation.

Swifting winds broach their orgasmic warning,
palm fronds click and rattle, sun winks, and exits.
Gusts create dust devils of gritty vortexes.
Looming above, salvation begins its dance.
Spattering smell of dusty fluidity
foreshadows dizzying drunkenness.
Nature’s drink comes in a torrential downpour,
quenching thirst in a dry county.

Erin Moen
6/29/03
Copyright 2003 ©


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Reviewed by Retta (Reindeer) Mckenzie 7/2/2003
This was beautiful, excellent imagery, I loved this poem so much,

Reindeer
Reviewed by Katy Walsvik 6/30/2003
Erin.. if you don't win I'd say it's an excelent conclusion to say the judges are 'brain dead'.. "companion clouds" <--- stopped me right in my tracks.. wonderful line.. Your efforts to incorporate the contest line is seamless.. you write without flaws.. from your fellow Wisconsinite, katy.
Reviewed by Christine Morell 6/30/2003
Very good luck in the contest. This is a superb piece, its imagery outstanding.Wonderful work.
~Chrissie
Reviewed by Leland Waldrip 6/30/2003
Excellent imagery and word smithing. If contests are good for nothing else, they do inspire.
Leland
Reviewed by Maria Lupinacci 6/30/2003
Erin,
Best of luck in the contest, you should kick butt with this piece! I am cheering you on!
Your imagery is always a visual master piece!

Hugs,
Maria
Reviewed by La Belle Rouge (Reader) 6/30/2003
Lovely work, you should win!
Reviewed by Dale Clark 6/30/2003
Your poetry is always excellent and awesome!
Reviewed by Bhuwan Thapaliya 6/30/2003
This is excellent write as always from you....BHUWAN
Reviewed by Alexandra* OneLight*® Authors & Creations 6/30/2003
"At times, she is Nuance"... **smiling**... I love this, and I love the whole poem.
Reviewed by Dove (Reader) 6/30/2003
Wonderful, deep write, Erin..Thanks for sharing..

Peace and love,
Dove
Reviewed by Michelle Kidwell Power In The Pen 6/30/2003
This was a beautiful piece, keep up the great work!
God Bless
~michelle~
Reviewed by jude forese 6/29/2003
extremely well crafted!
Reviewed by Jack Roberts 6/29/2003
Looks like a Blue Ribbon winner to me Erin!!!

Very Nice!

Jack
Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 6/29/2003
Fantastic Erin....great job on this one...let me go Quench My Thirst with a nica cuppa coffee!!

Love
tinka
Reviewed by E T Waldron 6/29/2003
Erin I agree with Dani! A superb write! Love the way you left it til last line gave it greater emphasis.
Reviewed by *********** ********** (Reader) 6/29/2003
I feel like I've lived a lifetime....in these words...Fantastic Erin...You're going to win...ah huh! Thanks, Dani
Reviewed by Elizabeth Taylor (Reader) 6/29/2003
I like the words and thoughts. Does it have to be in 8 line stanzas? I see it more in the free form style [like Josie Wooton uses] Just a suggestion to try. The imagery is fantastic.
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