Finding My Way is a story about finding your purpose in life in an unexpected way.

"Finding My Way"
  By Donna Webster

I suppose everyone wonders at one time or another what their true purpose in life really is. But for me that question started a journey that at times I was unsure of where it would lead. They say a journey begins with just one little step, but how do you know which way to go? At 32 years old I had no idea what life had in store for me, but I was about to find out in a way that I would have never imagined.


It all started when some very unusual things began happening to me. I started experiencing fatigue, headaches, muscle and joint pain, dry eyes and mouth, heartburn, acid reflux, and my body seemed to hurt all over for no apparent reason. At first I thought maybe I had the flu and figured it would go away in a few days. Then I noticed that my hands would go numb as I slept, and on most days I felt like I had been run over by a truck. Each day seemed to bring a new symptom and I finally decided to make a list of all of my symptoms and marched my way into the doctor's office hoping that he would not think I was crazy.


At my age I knew that I was to young to have so many things bothering me. As I presented my list to him he performed a pressure point exam on me, that I later learned is an exam used to help diagnose Fibromyalgia. The good news was that I was not crazy. The bad news was that I had an incurable illness called Fibromyalgia and there is no cure for it. Confused and upset by this news, I asked him what he was going to do to help me. Unfortunately, there was nothing he could do but provide me with medications to treat the symptoms I was experiencing. In a matter of moments I was given a life sentence of an incurable illness that would be with me for the rest of my life.


It all happened so fast and I wondered to myself why me? Why did this illness choose me? Was it something that I did or didn't do? I wondered how am I going to live the rest of my life knowing that I can never change this. I learned real fast that I had no control over this. The question is what am I going to do about it? It took a long time for me to realize that this is a part of me, and I had to find a way to embrace this part of me that I thought had no purpose in my life.


It was during that time that I started really thinking about the millions of people who deal with challenges like this every day of their lives. I thought about how it feels to lose a part of yourself and feel like nobody understands what you are going through. There were days when I felt like I was alone in this world and I had no idea what to do about it. I needed to figure out a way to not let this illness take away who I was and make it mean something.


After thinking about this for several months I decided that I wanted to reach out to others who were sick and help them in some way. I wanted to find a way to let others know that they are not alone and that someone cares about whatever they may be going through. I decided an inspirational poem would be something nice to pass along, but I had no idea of where in the world I was going to find a poem athat I could use.


It was then that the light bulb went off in my head and I remembered something very important. Many years ago I used to write poetry but had completely forgotten about it. So I found some of my old poems and it all started coming back to me, and I knew that I was going to be the one to write the special poems to send out to others. As I sat down to write, the words just poured through me. I couldn't believe it. That day as I took another step in my journey, I wrote more then twenty poems in a matter of hours.


At first I thought it was so easy for me, maybe what I was writing is not something that would make a difference. We are often taught growing up that it takes hard work to be good at something. I knew there was only one way to find out if what I wrote could really make a difference to someone. I was scared at first to share what I had written, but I knew I had to do it. This could very well be the answer to my question of finding my purpse in life.


Then the day came when I actually got the chance to take a poem to someone in person. It was at that moment that my life changed and I knew that I had been given this illness for a reason. I will never forget the tears in the women's eyes as she read my poem. I knew right then that I had truly made a difference in someones life.


My journey that started wth an illness paved the way for me to find out who I really am. You see we all have the power to change lives and we all have been given amazing gifts that make each one of us special in this world. The key is to take a look inside our self and begin that discoverey of finding out who we really are. We're all born with greatness inside of us and if you take the time to look inside yoursef, you will find that the path you are chosen to walk in this life, begins and ends with you.


With a little faith, hope, and courage, I believe we can all find our own way. Imagine all the things that are possible for us if we take the time to believe in ourselves.

Copyright 2003 Donna Webster