It’s OK to play.

September 16th, 2001

My Amy just turned 24. In many ways, she’s the adult that society requires her to be. Work. Pay taxes. Conform to societal rules and regulations. But there is a part of Amy that will NEVER play the game. Not society's game anyway.

It's the part of her that plays games with her sons.

She blows bubbles into her cola with a straw and pays attention only to her son who laughs as he does the same. She ignores the stares of other diners and I feel sorry for them that they can’t have as much fun as these two are having.

There’s a part of her that runs through the sprinklers until she’s dripping wet, just because her son wants her to.

She teaches her sons how to make a flower with finger paint.

The times she’s watched Barney are too numerous to count. Including the times when she was alone.

She reads stories over and over, until the words are so memorized, that the book isn’t really needed.

She has shown patience that I never knew she had and is so evident in her daily life.

I think of her now, my Amy, and realize I am so very proud of her. And I love her with all my heart.

There is another part of Amy that has surfaced since the death of her sister, Cassy, almost 11 months ago. The part that grew up fast and became a bit more serious. The part that realized, today isn’t always going to be here. The part that now makes sure she shows just how much she loves and cares for her other sisters, her sons, and me.

Another part has become stronger. Amy has always had her thoughtful, caring, loving moments. When others forgot, didn’t have time or just didn’t care, she remembered, made time and cared. For me, for others, for total strangers. Now, that part of her is even more prevalent. More important to her. So much so, that there are no longer doubts as to the depth of her love, devotion, thoughtfulness and caring.

I must admit, she and I have had our rocky times. Some times were so rocky, I thought for sure, we’d reached an impasse.

Now, we are closer than we have been for a long time. The best part is yet to come, because I know, we’re going to be even closer.