How To Install A Wireless Security System

If you read about my cookbook, "How Mama Made Gravy From An Old Flat Tire... No Sir, This Ain't Your Everyday Southern Cookbook!", then you know it claims to have a section in the back I call "Lagniappe" which means a little something extra. This is the fun section of the book. It's an entire section devoted to humor, stories, advice, poetry, quips, quotes, and inspiration. This section of the book sets it apart from any other cookbook. Here's one short example of the humor: pg. 109

How To Install A Wireless Security System:

Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's used work boots... a really big pair. Put them outside your front door on top of a copy of Guns and Ammo magazine. Put a dog dish beside it... a really big one. Leave a note on the front door that says something like, "Bubba, Tiny and I have gone to get more ammunition. Be back in 1/2 an hour. Don't disturb the Pit bulls, they've just been wormed."


"If God is your co-pilot, you better switch seats!"