Activate your imagination and picture a scene something like a chat show....

'Hi Everyone, well tonight on the Chat Show From Hell, we have a very special guest celebrity. Even the Rolling Stones have sung about him! Most of you will never have seen him, or met him, but, believe me you will most certainly know him!

It seems, for most of existence he has been the subject of some very unfortunate, extremely bad reviews and also a mass of bad press too!

We were contacted by his newly appointed P.R. Man, a Man you all know as well...Ladies and Gentlemen please give a hot welcome to the Devil himself, P.R. Man Extraordinaire....Satan!!!!!'

Satan comes on stage like a sleazy P.R. man and says,

'Now look, I get a pretty bad press myself, but really you know I'm just a Party Animal. But enough of me!  Ladies, Gentlemen and All Souls, my first and at present only client...please give a hot ooops warm welcome for the one and only, recently back from a global tour with sadly, no rave reviews.  Few if any know of his gravely singing voice and first the first time time ever on any World Stage I give  you Death 101 - Rapper Extraordinaire...

Cue Music:

I know that you don't like me much

And that makes me so sad

I cannot say I dislike you for if I did I'm Bad!

And Bad I am, The Bad Ass 1, The Bad Ass Number One, The Number One in Bad Asses, Yo! I'm called Death 101!

You see me come if you run like Hell

You'll damage all your joints

And that ain't very good for you

And what would be the point?

You should come embrace me

For I don't kill you off

I'm only there to greet you

When you're ready and when you're not!

And Bad I am, The Bad Ass 1, The Bad Ass Number One, The Number One in Bad Asses, Yo! I'm called Death 101!

And when you're not you can't blame me

'Cos that ain't very fair

I've only come to say, 'Hello! Would you like to go to ...where?

Where to go and when to leave

You cannot know right now

You'll only know when you get there

And I might be just where?

And Bad I am, The Bad Ass 1, The Bad Ass Number One, The Number One in Bad Asses, Yo! I'm called Death 101!

Whenever you are ready

Whether you think so, or not

I'm only there to say 'Hello!

'Let's face it, I ain't HOT!

Well not hot like they thinks below

When they meet me you see

The temperature is normal

So you can be at ease!

And Bad I am, The Bad Ass 1, The Bad Ass Number One, The Number One in Bad Asses, Yo! I'm called Death 101!

I will not chop your head right off

You might be passing by

If so come back here anytime

And speak to this lonely guy!

I never go to parties

Nor round to friends for tea

Or just hang out, do stoopid stuff

No one wants to party with me!

And Bad I am, The Bad Ass 1, The Bad Ass Number One, The Number One in Bad Asses, Yo! I'm called Death 101!

Even when I'm shopping

The people look and stare

Would there be more reaction

If they saw me bare?

Now there's a thang

What would they think

I wonder what they'd do

If now and then I would appear

In my Birthday Suit!

And Bad I am, The Bad Ass 1, The Bad Ass Number One, The Number One in Bad Asses, Yo! I'm called Death 101!

They'd never guess just who I was

And even if I'd say

'Coo-eee! I'm Death, I'm starkers!'

The cops would haul me away!

I'd say to them, 'I'm Death I am!'

Don't think they'd be impressed!

They'd leave me in their cells they would

In my state of undress!

And Bad I am, The Bad Ass 1, The Bad Ass Number One, The Number One in Bad Asses, Yo! I'm called Death 101!

So I won't go round skyclad

See I speak Wiccan too

In fact I speak all languages

Even the animal's in the Zoo!

I don't mean to sneak up on you

For I'm just standing there

Waiting for the next in line

It stretches down the stairs!

And Bad I am, The Bad Ass 1, The Bad Ass Number One, The Number One in Bad Asses, Yo! I'm called Death 101!

And through The Lounge and Vestibule

Into the Streets below

Then down into the Subway

Where's it end, well I don't know!

I'm only there to greet you

And then we say, 'Good Bye!'

Death 101 is here right now

I'm just your regular guy!

And Bad I am, The Bad Ass 1, The Bad Ass Number One, The Number One in Bad Asses, Yo! I'm called Death 101!

Scene fades to rapturous applause.......