The Elves of Woodhaven
The Legacy of Hickory Robinbreast
Chapter 5: Two Visitors Come Visiting
The next day Pappy and Ho could not go to the olive groves. It had started to rain sometime during the night. In Woodhaven it does not rain cats and dogs as it does in other places in the world. It rains bears and lions in Woodhaven. Or that at least is how the saying goes for when it rains here; it rains so hard that if you were to stand outside in it you would be clobbered just as if a bear or lion clobbered you.
Pappy was in no mood to be clobbered. He decided that today would be a good day to catch up on all of the household repairs that he had been promising Mammy he would do. Yesterday he had not quite finished the cellar steps. He had replaced six boards when oncoming night made him retire. You can’t be hammering and sawing in the evening when you have got three very young children and a wife that will be giving you another very soon. There were more steps to replace.
These would be first on his list of chores. After a breakfast of oats and milk Pappy set about to his tasks. He had pried the rusty nails out of two of the old rotting boards and was just about to begin the third when he noticed that this third step had big puddles of cooled wax upon it. He had never noticed this before. It must have happened fairly recently he surmised for Mammy was an extremely thorough housekeeper even at this late stage of child carrying.
Pappy did not like the idea of his wife toiling so hard in her condition. He had often told her that she should take it easy and relax. He and Ho would do the work around the house. But Mammy was stubborn in so many ways.
“If I don’t do it,” she would say, “then it would never get done!” So she would be hard at the chores – her big belly making the labor even more difficult than it already was. It was no wonder that she complained about never getting any help. She wouldn’t let anybody help her. She’d do it herself and then gripe about having to do it afterwards.
As he bent over to examine the wax, Pappy wondered if Mammy had finally decided to take his advice and lay off the chores until after the child was born.
His nose began to twitch as it smelled the wax. Something was not quite right. A wood elf has a very keen sense of smell. They could smell a wet dog three miles away. They need not look at a paw print in the mud to tell them what kind of animal had passed by. Their noses would tell it for them.
There was something not quite right about the smell of the wax. There was some other odor mixed in there with it. Pappy knew that his nose did not lie. His nose was telling him that the other smell that he was whiffing was the bitter aroma of burnt flesh.
“Can you come upstairs for a moment, dearie?”
Pappy looked up and saw Mammy standing at the cellar doorway. He noticed that the bubbles on Mammy’s lips had gone down quite a bit during the night. Pappy was very good at arithmetic but in this case he could not put one plus one together.
“What is it, dearie?” he asked Mammy.
“We have visitors, dearie,” Mammy answered.
“What?” Pappy said with disbelief. “In this weather?”
“Sometimes a rainy day is the best time to visit a friend,” Mammy replied. “Please come up now, dearie. We must not keep our guests waiting.”
Pappy had no choice but to go upstairs. He had no idea of whom the visitors might be. And when he saw them he still did not have any idea.
Sitting on the living room sofa eating dainty tea biscuits were two elderly elves that Pappy had never seen even in the inns and taverns of Woodhaven. Everybody in this quaint elf town went to the taverns. If you didn’t show your face there odds were that you had no face to be seen.
Judging by these two elderly gentlemen, if they had ever been in any of the inns of Woodhaven, word would have gotten around about them. They had faces that one could not easily forget.
Although not altogether homely, they lacked that certain charm that was the essence of every elf’s mien. Both had as what could be described as haggard faces. Their eyes, although elfin in character, were drawn and tired. Red veins shot through them as if they were maps to meandering rivers. The one gentleman was thick in the face and chest while the other was gaunt and hollow. Both wore characteristic elfin tunics although these were in a sorry state of repair. Pappy guessed that neither had a good woman to take care of them.
“Pappy,” Mammy said, “I would like you to meet Mr. Bobbs and Mr. Apple.
“Hello, Mr. Robinbreast. I am Talla. Talla Bobbs,” the heavyset elf said, extending out a fat hand in greeting. His voice was as deep as his chest.
“Pleased to meet you, Mr. Robinbreast. My name is Fender Apple,” the thin elf said. His hand felt bony and fragile. Fender Apple’s voice was musical although somewhat out of tune.
“Don’t call me Mr. Robinbreast. You make me sound staunchy and formal. Folks around here call me Merek. You have already met my wife Silvie,” Pappy said while at the same time wondering where he had heard these names before. As sure as shooting, he had heard the names Talla Bobbs and Fender Apple somewhere before. But where, he could not just now remember.
“Thank you once again for the biscuits, Mrs. Robin … er, I mean Silvie,” Talla Bobbs said, his voice clotted with chewed cookies.
“The mint tea will be ready in a minute, gentlemen,” Mammy said. “In fact, I will got to the kitchen and get your cups ready.”
Mammy waddled out of the room. Pappy watched her leave and wondered where the children were. Must be napping, he guessed. What else could kids do on a rainy day?
“Terrible weather we are having, wouldn’t you say Merek?” Fender Apple commented, his sallow eyes looking deeply into Pappy’s.
“It’s gotta rain some time, I guess,” Pappy replied, feeling somewhat uncomfortable by the intensity of the thin elf’s stare.
“Problem is no time is a good time for rain,” Talla Bobbs said between smacking his lips. The cookies must be dry, Pappy thought. Mammy should hurry along with the tea.
“It seems that we put everything off for a rainy day and we hope like crazy that that rainy day will never come because we know that we as sure as dickens will be busy that day,” Fender Apple said. His eyes never left Pappy’s for an instant.
What did these two gentlemen want, Pappy wondered. If they have business to discuss with him they did not seem to be in any hurry to go about it.
In the kitchen, Pappy heard the kettle start to whistle. Good, Mammy will be back here soon with the tea. Once Mammy is back he would not feel as uncomfortable as he did at present.
“You are not from Woodhaven?” Pappy asked.
Talla Bobbs laughed heartily. “You haven’t seen the likes of Fender and I around the local taverns, have you Merek?”
“Can’t say that I have,” Pappy replied. The chubby elf’s laughter made him feel more at ease.
“It has been years since we have been to Woodhaven, Merek,” Fender Apple stated. His stare was as unwavering as ever.
“It’s been many, many years since we have been here. I must say that it has not changed that much in all that time,” Talla said jauntily. His fat fingers were grabbing at another biscuit or two.
“It is a lovely town, Woodhaven. I have many fond memories of this place,” Fender Apple concurred.
‘Can’t he ever stop staring?’ Pappy thought to himself. Those buggy eyes were driving him crazy.
“Er …” Pappy did not know what he was about to say. Oh yes; now he remembered. “I have lived in Woodhaven all my life. Never have I thought of leaving this little town. You might say that I have my roots here.”
“Mr. Apple and myself know little of agriculture. Perhaps that is why we have never dug ourselves into any one place?” Talla said. “My! These are good cookies! Did Mrs. Robinbreast bake them?”
“That she did!” Pappy said proudly. “She has a fine hand at anything that she does.”
“Her baking is exquisite!” Talla Bobbs said, his tongue finding it difficult to dodge his chewing. He swallowed. “Fender, you must try some of these biscuits. The bakers in heaven would be hard pressed to match them!”
“You and I will learn soon enough the delicacies of Heaven, Talla,” Fender Apple said dryly.
Pappy thought that that was a crude thing to say. The grand-elf seemed to lack all the refinery that goes along with his elder age. Here, Pappy thought, was a stern elf that could not enjoy life. The cold, staring eyes told him all of that.
“Let’s not rush things along, Fender,” Talla Bobbs croaked. “We are still of this Earth and because of that we may partake of the bounty that it offers. Try one of the cookies, Fender. I insist! They are as delightful to the palate as Woodhaven is to the eye!”
The thin elf did not make a reply. Pappy could see that Talla was disconcerted by Mr. Apple’s behavior. “Well, if you shan’t have any that leaves more for me!” His chubby hands were reaching for more of the rapidly diminishing tray of biscuits.
At that moment, mammy came in with a silver teapot whose spout was a geyser of steam. “The tea will be steeped in a few minutes, gentleman,” she said as she set it down on the small cart that Pappy had fashioned out of olive wood.
“Mrs. Robinbreast …” Talla Bobbs began.
“Please call me Silvie,” Mammy interrupted.
“Silvie, I was just remarking on what a treasure your baked biscuits are. Truly, only an elf with child could bake this way!”
Mammy blushed.
“Mammy, that’s what the kids and I call Silvie, has never known how to handle a compliment. She always gets so gushy!” Pappy said with a laugh. He was grateful that she was back in the room.
“Perhaps, I’d know what to do with a compliment if I ever got one around here, dearie!” Mammy said with a bite.
“What do you mean?” Pappy replied with consternation. “I compliment you every day!”
Mammy chuckled, “I’ll talk to you after about that one Pappy.”
“One elf’s compliment is another’s insult,” Talla Bobbs said. He had finished the last cookie and was now looking with thirsty eyes at the tea.
Mammy took the cue and began to pour out four cups.
“None for me, thanks,” Fender Apple said with a halting hand. “I make a point of only having tea in the evening. It keeps me regular, you might say.”
“You’ve never been a regular in your life, Fender Apple, and you know that for a fact!”
“Neither have you Talla Bobbs! You’ve been stranger than a stranger!” Fender retaliated.
“Speaking of strangers,” Mammy said while clearing her throat. She was handing out the poured tea to Mr. Bobbs and Pappy. “Pappy, have you learned the reason why our two guests have decided to visit?”
“No, Mammy.” Pappy felt embarrassed that Mammy would say this in front of their company.
“Think of the names Pappy. Where have you heard the names Talla Bobbs and Fender Apple before?”
Pappy looked at Mammy with a blank stare. Talla Bobbs? Fender Apple? He had heard those names before. But where?
“Think of an old elf that liked to sketch and could never be separated from his pipe,” Mammy gave Pappy a clue.
“Great Uncle Hickory?” Pappy said more to himself than to the others although everybody heard him. Pappy had a wealth of memories concerning the dearly departed grand elf. He probably knew more about the Great Uncle than he did about himself. Uncle Hickory had led a life that extensive chronicles could be written about. He had adventures in England and in Spain. He had traveled to the New World aboard a Dutch merchant vessel. There was so much that Pappy knew about Hickory that to isolate two names connected with him was like searching for a needle in a haystack. Given time an elf will find that needle. Talla Bobbs. Fender Apple.
He now recalled.
His face began to shine and his eyes became glowing orbs. Mammy whispered to her two guests, “Pappy remembers you now!”
“That is as sure as tootin!” Pappy regaled. “You, Talla Bobbs,” Pappy pointed to the chubby elf. “You and Hickory were thrown in jail in Portugal. The people there had accused the two of you of heisting some gems from a prominent baron who lived in Castelo Branco!”
Talla Bobbs turned eleven and a half shades of red. “Hick and I never took the jewels!” Talla blustered.
But Pappy did not even hear him. He was busy pointing a finger at the thin elf. “And you Fender Apple got them out!”
“’Twas an expensive bribe that I still am not sure as to whether I got my money’s worth,” Fender Apple said in a shallow voice. Finally his eyes were averted from Pappy. He was now staring at Talla Bobbs with an appraising expression within his cold pupils.
“Wasn’t what I heard!” Pappy cried. “Uncle Hickory told me that you used an ingenious and devious scheme to get them out right from underneath the jailers’ noses!”
“If offerin’ up a lifetime’s savin’s to a greedy lock-key is ingenious and devious, then it was,” Fender said blandly.
“Ah, that was a trying time, young Merek,” Talla Bobbs sighed. His blubbery hands were in a bit of a tremble. It made holding his teacup an awkward venture. He set it down on the cart.
“Why do you say that it was a trying time?” Mammy asked. “The way Uncle Hickory, bless his soul, explained things it seems that his whole life was a breeze.”
“Your Uncle Hickory was not an elf to go talking about his personal pains and tribulations. But I tell you, old Hick, he had a difficult life. He was tried and tried again to the best of his endurance. Take for instance the Castelo Branco episode. We were lucky to get out of there with our lives,” Talla Bobbs said. His voice was quivering.
“With your lives?” Pappy and Mammy said with disbelief.
“Uncle Hickory never said anything about any danger,” Pappy continued.
“Of course, he wouldn’t! Hick was not one to go and deliberately upset children especially kin. I take it that you were just a strapling when he told you about his Portuguese adventure?”
Pappy nodded.
“Well let me set you straight about what had actually transpired in the city of Castelo Branco. It’s a bit of a tale so please bear with me,” Talla Bobbs said solemnly.
“Perhaps, we should get some more tea if we have a lot of listening to do,” Mammy suggested. The child in her stomach was very active and very agitated.
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