In the past few months, it has been a lesson in being part of a group...a group of writers and authors who are more than who we read from their pens/computers.  As the months have passed, and I've become involved in the family of writers, it is apparent that we as humans tend to have needs that are not always as "writers-authors".  Joining this group of distinguished and on their way to being published writers and authors, the picture as a whole is changing for me. 

The first few weeks as a member I asked so many questions that it was plain to see that soon I was being led, helped, nudged in the right direction....the how to's of being a member of the AD family.  Many on the site were eager to help me to learn the way to post, and how to write my bio so that it would be "hit" more often, and the list went on.  So many informative notes about how to be more aware, how to get my work read more often, how to find publishers, editors, reviewers, and also how to find people with experience in marketing and promotion.

It wasn't long before I had a small following...trackers they are called on this site; and I was thrilled to know that the list was growing and it gave me so much support that I began to write more often. Soon I was posting blogs.  I'd never done blogs before...too intimidated.  Then...I just wrote whatever I felt I wanted to say about whatever subject came to my heart and mind.  I decided from the beginning that I would be a member who shares, and supports the works of others...one who will be honest and yet not  be mean or rude when I review and/or comment... It's important that we read and review or comment...that we be honest and give our true opinion...but it is not necessary to be arrogant or hurtful when reviewing. 

As time has passed, it's become even more apparent that people have issues...often personal issues, and they express it in their writings.  I am one of the masses who does this, and it's evident that is what writing is about.  At the same time, it gives us a forum, a place and way to purge, to let go of hurts, pain, loss, and also to share the joys and wonderful things/events in our lives.  The balance of good and bad is what is the normal to me, and is how I write...depending on my mood, or circumstance.

Soon it was a letdown when I saw my "trackers" were leaving....and then my reviews became fewer, and no matter what topic I wrote about, happy,sad, tragic, or just folly...almost no one read or reviewed. Wow..that was a slap in the face! Then...I noticed others were stressing over this subject, and were taking it quite hard...it was depressing them, and affecting their mental and personal well being! Shocking was more the word that came to me...why? During the months I also discovered that people on AD get upset/mad/angry/ticked off at one another...they don't always agree...they state these disagreements often in bitter and hurtful ways...then..others just quit! Quit! Drop out of the AD, give up or crawl into their shell again...or they go elsewhere and begin anew... I call it "running away"....not facing the issue.  I've run away from problems way too often in life, and AD is not going to be the catalyst that makes me quit now. It is how we view this site that can make it a true asset to our writing experience.

That is when I realized that, many members write and love to write...many publish and many will never publish...but this is a forum for their personal needs.  They need to have an outlet of expression.  They need to be heard...to be a part of....to feel wanted, and to be liked.  Some people always have drama in their lives...and thus...it continues on the den too... oh...small drama, but nonetheless..it is often an ongoing soap opera.  Other members just ignore everyone, and do their own thing...they write, they post, they don't care about the "others" or whether or not they are liked or not....they just write and go on with their lives...   Some become part of a family with other members...and they rely on those in their select group...a selection that just happens...for some reason...certain types draw the same, and thus... we fit into our slot in the family and/or group.

Many new members come on with so much hope and aspirations...believing that we as a group will help them, and guide them to something "unknown"...because they are inexperienced...and hope this site will enlighten them...so that they will be more ready as writers/authors.  Some new members never get welcomed or acknowledged and they just go into their secret place and never interact or participate.  Such a loss is how I feel about this....WE should be a help, a hope, assist and help whenever possible...if we can.  Obviously we should be quiet and remain in the background if we don't know of what we speak...let the ones who know teach...and we can also learn.  I learn something every single day that I am on this site.

Another thing I've learned over time is this...some of us really care about you...and some of us want to help...want to share...and in so doing...we also receive... The talent on this site is immense.  One can not measure the brilliant writers and their work; but we can acknowledge them if we read something that we enjoy or like.  Of course, you have the option to simply do nothing...that is our privilege isn't it?

Just to say, and perhaps just to say to myself, in writing, perhaps the reason I write is because I must...it keeps me healthy and  every once in awhile gives someone joy or hope or brings a tear....but to me...it keeps me healthy...mentally and emotionally.  For all the negatives that I've also noticed on this site, with the bickering, the rudeness, the mean reviews, the hurting of others...I've also experienced and seen the goodness of many... the super lovely giving and generosity of people who don't have to bother!  In the midst of this, I've also seen selfish acts, and extremely giving acts of kindness....which is a reminder that we are the world....we are the people we write about...we are the people who are good, bad, indifferent.... 

Some weeks I gain a few trackers, and then I lose a few...I never get many reviews, and I see many who have so many reviews and wonderful positive things happening with their writing...and I haven't been so fortunate...YET...but... it doesn't make me angry or hurt.  I know that one day I too will gain the acknowledgement for my work...not because I am well liked, or because people pity me...or because I'm part of the right clique...but because my work is good..  Why would I want less? 

Strangely...In the short months I've been here, and especially the past two months, I have been able to complete more work than ever! Many have, without knowing, helped me with their advice to others, and/or through Roundtable questions and responses.  I've learned so much belonging to this site, good and bad...but mainly that I am responsible for ME...  I will keep writing and reading and reviewing as much as time allows....because I know it's important to YOU... so... just want to thank you for being here for me...  I have written a novel in 30 days....a good one I hope.  I have also written seven articles that will be printed in various places.  My book is not selling like hotcakes...but it is selling...and for that I am so grateful!  I have another book ready for publishing in Spring 09, and one in summer 09.  I've grown in my work in many positive ways....and much of it is in thanks to you...

For those who are hurt, angry, upset, disappointed.... please realize that we are only human...and we have issues and problems too... maybe even bigger problems than yours...just that...too often a problem is never as big as yours....right?  Focus on your work...make it better....try not to be so hard on yourself... afterall, enough people are hard on us without us helping them!!! :-))

AD is my therapeutic learning lesson place... use it for whatever you need.... and take the negatives and turn them into great, wonderful achievements....  

lindalaw