Nude-Night-Naughty 3 & 4

“Yeah,” you say, “but who’s interested in this real estate and finance stuff?”

Well, says I, I’m a writer and as a writer I must let you the reader know the “how” the “where” and the “why” and follow the sequence of events and the circumstances that caused and led up to the banning of, “senior citizen” Shannon Lynne and, “geezer” Mitchell Lipensky from Westlake Lake. Which, in thinking about it, as home owners paying monthly homeowners dues, they were part… admittedly a very small part of the owners of Westlake Lake.

Just a hint to hold your interest as – or if for nothing more than to appease my “writer” status, I’ll get into the “how” and the… Well you know what I’m talking about – Anyway, as a hint to hold your interest; the “senior citizen” and the “geezer” getting kicked off the lake did have a little… just a smidgen of sex involved.

That said…

During the recession of the mid to late seventies, when real estate interest rates were up to seventeen percent and as Mitchell Lipensky worked primarily with low end financial people whom, at this time, couldn’t qualify for a home, much less pay seventeen percent interest, his business nose-dived, and it nose-dived to such an extent that Marsha and Mitchell were forced to put their home on the market in order to save it from foreclosure.

Now along comes Mr. and Mrs. Daniel Westgarden who smelled a deal so,    “creative financing” in full swing: Through their broker, of course, the Westgardens offered ten thousand below the listed price – because part of their deal was – Because their daughter and her family would be in need of lovely house in a good neighborhood within a month, the Westgarden’s wanted a two week escrow and, they in turn, would pay all escrow and commissions. However… Big “however”, there would be no cash payment at the close of escrow because the present owners were asked to carry back an eighteen thousand – which, at the selling price, would be all of the money needed for the Lipensky’ to put down an another house, so – the Westgarden’ wanted an eighteen thousand “second trust deed” at 8% interest for three years.

“Let’s see,” said Mitchell to Marsha: Ten grand below “asking”. A two week escrow — which terrified Marsha — And, other than the full commission, after the broker’s share, of course, both ends of the commission his, the only money Mitchell, presently, would receive from the sale of his house was his end of the commission that, actually, when you think about it, was really his money after all.  

“So,” said Mitchell. “We’d better take it…”

“So,” answered his wife, “before the bank does.”

                                                              ****

“What are we going to do?” Marsha asked after the initial Deposit Receipt signing. Where are we going to live?”

“Hmmm?” thought Mitchell. “I’ve an Idea.”

Okay, once again enter Mr. and Mrs. Alvin Berkowitz whom are presently going absolutely nuts at having to pay two, seventeen percent (17%) monthly payments, and so, calls are made by him twice-weekly to hear the progression of the sale of the Berkowitz townhouse – which wasn’t. No progression, that is – in lovely, though by now very far away, Westlake Village. California. And so…

“Hmmm?” thought Mitchell. “I’ve an Idea.”

“Yeah?” said his wife.

“How’d you like to live in Westlake Village?”

So, again, I ask: See where this is going?

Nude-Night-Naughty 4

So, okay, already, here’s what happened on that balmy summer night of August 12, 2008 when Mitchell Lipensky and Shannon Lynne were banned from Westlake Lake…

Packing a “Subway” of  a foot-long for him and a half foot-long for her, along with an  ice packed “Igloo” containing four bottles of Corona along with a unpopped bottle of Pinot Gricio, senior citizen Shannon Lynne and Geezer Mitchell Lipensky decided to take their boat out…

Hold on!! Boat? “Their boat?” Well, yeah! Guess there’s still some stuff to explain.

Yeah, I know! But I’ll try to keep it short, so…  

Immediately following the initial Real Estate Deposit Receipt signing in 1978; “Where are we going to live?”

“I’ve an Idea.” Mitchell said to his wife.

And, “Yeah?” said his wife.

“How’d you like to live in Westlake Village?”

Knowing about, “ ‘Berkowitz’?” she questioned.

“Yeah.”

“Yeah, I’d love to live in Westlake. But how? We can’t buy shit without a down payment!”

“Yeah, well, like I said: I’ve an idea.” Mitchell reiterated.

                                                           ****

Within a half-hour, the copy of the Deposit Receipt for the sale of his house on his broker’s desk, “I want to make an offer on the ‘Berkowitz’ place,” Mitchell said, “but we've practically no money for a down payment,” slapping his hand onto the paperwork for the sale of his house, “because our moneys’ tied-up in ‘Westgarden’s’ second, so I need your help in putting a…” creatively financed, “deal together.” And…

                                                            ****

Within another hour, on ‘long distance’, Mr. Berkowitz. Hi! It’s Mitch Lipensky.”

“Yeah, Mitch.” No longer believing, “you got anything?” Berkowitz asked dejectedly.

“Well, yes, I do. I do have an offer.”  

Not bothering to hold his hand over the receiver, “Honey,” he yelled, causing Mitchell to move the receiver from his ear. “It’s Lipensky and he has an offer!”

“Well,” once hearing muted duel breathing, “actually it’s me. My wife and me! We’re making an offer on your townhouse.”

Asked cautiously, “You?”

“Yes. Me and my wife.”

“Okay, go ahead. We’re, uh, Mrs. Berkowitz and myself, we’re listening.”

“We are offering to buy your house at the full listed price…” Hearing a sharp intake of breath, “However, we, my wife and I, will place one thousand dollars into Escrow and the deed of trust is to remain in your name, in escrow, for three years or, dependent upon my wife and myself, sooner. During this period, we will pay your P.I.T.I;  your principle, interest, taxes and insurance. However, including the thousand dollars held in escrow, we want one hundred dollars per month going towards our down-payment, which will be accredited at close of escrow. In the event we do not have financing…”— imagining the recession to be through by then — “…or for any reason we do not close escrow, we will forfeit our thousand dollars and whatever has accrued during the term of this escrow.” Taking a deep breath, he stopped speaking. 
                                                           *****

Marsha and Mitchell moved into the house….

Marsha and Mitchell Lipensky moved into their new ‘home’ in Westlake Village – with but one thousand dollars held in escrow, actually paying less P.I.T.I. monthly than on their old house – in September of nineteen seventy-eight.

Burton and Shannon Lynne moved directly next door in December of nineteen-eighty.

So, can you see where this is going? Maybe.

To be continued

©July 30,  2012 / Mark M. Lichterman