Recently, I had a discussion with a male friend of mine in regards to gift-giving, specifically at Valentine’s Day. From the discussion, I was able to ascertain that there seems to be a trend among young women that seems rather odd to me: the idea of asking the husband or boyfriend, depending on the woman’s status, what he is planning to buy as a gift for them on the holiday. This trend seems to go against everything my parents taught me as a child. I was always taught to be grateful for each gift I was given and to accept it, with a smile, even if the item was not something I wanted or if the gift was something I had already received.
I understand that not all women like surprises and I know, in some instances and regarding some purchases, a little pre-planning for the gift may be needed. (Let’s face it: Men don’t excel in determining dress sizes and other things.) Still, in my view, it seems rather tasteless, rude and downright odd for anyone to flat out ask, “What are you getting me?”
A few years ago, I remember hearing the story of a man who honored his wife’s Valentine’s Day wishes. The man had asked his “Valentine,” specifically, what she wanted for the holiday. Her response: “I don’t want anything.” When the husband took the literal stance and purchased nothing, the wife became angered. This story is the opposite of my issue at hand. In this case, if the woman had told her mate the truth about what she wanted, he could have purchased it and hence, an argument would have been spared. In my eyes, it would seem to make more sense for the women to casually tell the man what she wants as opposed to asking, “What are you getting me?”
Then again, since a recent ItsaSurvey poll cites that “61% of women wanted a surprise gift from their mates, as proof that he put some thought into the gift,” maybe the “greed issue,” as I see it, is a generational dilemma or an isolated offense.
Regardless of whether or not the problem is a generational difference or a legitimate issue, I hope everyone has a wonderful Valentine’s Day, filled with the gifts or surprises you had hoped to receive.
© 2008 – Jill Eisnaugle. All rights reserved.
Jill Eisnaugle is the author of the books, Coastal Whispers & Under Amber Skies. She is also the Resident Poet for SUNNY 99.1 FM in Houston, Texas and toast writer for the radio station's annual Valentine's Day Wedding. She resides in Texas City, Texas with her family and pets.