To Christians, worldwide, Easter is a time to reflect and to celebrate the resurrection of the Lord. Recent surveys have shown that nearly 25% of exes keep photographs of their past lovers. This trend led me to question whether or not it is a good idea to consider rekindling the past in an effort to “resurrect” romance.
Whether you are suffering the loss of a pet or the loss of a failed relationship, the past is a hard bump in life’s road. If we cling to the past, we slowly lose our sanity and also our ability to move forward; yet, if we try to block the past from our minds, all together, we run the risk of damaging the very fabric and memories that have made us who we are. The question at hand for the sake of this discussion, however, is whether or not pursuing old flames is worth the effort.
For some people, I am sure re-kindling relationships is a worthwhile idea. If the couple dated as teenagers, when hormones and ill-temperament ran wild, it is possible that the two, as adults, could re-connect and have a fulfilling and lasting bond. (After all, some sparks were there as teens) In many cases, though, especially in this age of sky-high divorce rates, the animosity that often exists within couples, thanks to a break-up, is much to overcome. That knowledge leads me to question if re-kindling a past relationship is really worth the effort.
In both the aforementioned scenarios, whether re-kindling the relationship works or not, I believe it is imperative that the person interested in re-connecting with past flames stop for a moment and take the time to consider the reasons why the break-up/disconnect happened in the beginning. If the relationship failed due to infidelity or abuse, would giving the past lover a second chance be worth the risk, if he or she has not changed? If the relationship failed due to age differences or maturity issues, I think it is best that the individuals take some time to have a “feeling out” process to see if, indeed, both have grown. Men and women mature at different levels and given time, people can and do, sometimes, grow apart.
More than anything else, though, my opinion is this: If you loved once and think you can love again, feel free to resurrect your relationship, at will, harboring an opened mind, looking towards the future and not the past. If you stop to analyze what caused your relationship to break apart and see that those elements have not changed, then it is probably best to treat the feelings you may still have as a continued phase of the healing process and focus on bettering your own life and your goals.
Whichever route you choose, I hope you find happiness and I hope you have a Happy Easter!
© 2008 – Jill Eisnaugle.
All Rights Reserved.
Jill Eisnaugle is the author of the poetry books Coastal Whispers & Under Amber Skies. She resides in Texas City, Texas with her family and pets.