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Sandi Lyn Schraut

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Goodby to addicts!
By Sandi Lyn Schraut
Last edited: Monday, January 14, 2008
Posted: Friday, April 07, 2006

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Sandi Lyn Schraut

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My goodby letter to addicts

Dear addicts,
This is a goodbye letter to addicts. I have to leave you and your sad pretense to what is important. I wish I could make you be a friend, but you do not have the tools of love that are needed to be my friend. The saddest day of my life is to know that I have loved so many whose only true love was their addiction. I tried, Oh God how I tried, to show addicts that my love is more important then the high of crack or whatever drug that is your love today. I was left standing in the rain of my own tears saying goodbye once again.
From today on until I go to meet my maker I will only share myself with people who have the capacity to share back, whole hearted sharing, not just the bit you gave to keep me waiting in line. Should you one day finally release your need to your higher power and become a person with the higher power calling the shots rather then the high, we will try again to become friends.
I choose to live life in the light of day, in the reality of what is truth, and the spirit of my God. Today is my day, today is my life, today I came to realize the futility of living to make another happy, or comfortable. I cannot and will not ever again live for another and forget to live myself.
Tomorrow will be handled when it arrives, for it is only a possibility, today is my reality, right now is my moment.
May Gods strength and faith lead you to his side and make you well, I am not strong enough to be that strength, and faith in me will not help in your recovery. We can be friends, we can have hope but, we can not have a relationship with addiction as a partner.
I do not hate anymore that only damages me, and makes you feel worse then you already do so just know I care without judging or bitterness.
I choose my life without the darkness and without the fears I once knew.
Gods blessing on all people wherever you are and under which cloud you sleep.
Gods Blessings for this day.


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Reviewed by Jennifer Holly MacDonald 1/29/2011
Beautiful expression of what is so common in our culture. Everyone living and breathing on this planet loves another that is addicted to something that has the potnetial to destroy them both.
Reviewed by Janet Caldwell 10/28/2007
Excellent advice. We've also said good riddance to the addicts that we knew. Whether it's drug, alcohol or people addiction, they cab suck the life out of you. We are very proud of you for getting your degree, your self esteem in tact and moving on. Good for you friend.

Janet & Alan xoxoxo
Reviewed by Flying Fox Ted L Glines 12/26/2006
Deep feeling here, Sandi, and well expressed. I think it is very appropriate for you to withdraw from your attempts to nurture drug addicts. Someone once said (it might have been Jesus) "I love you but I don't like what you do." This statement sets up an adult frame for viewing an addict, instead of the parental frame where you try to nurture them. Nurturing only works when the food you offer is what the child seeks - all else will be rejected. My organization interacts with convicted criminals in jails, prisons, and juvenile detention facilities. We have found that about 80% of them are (or were and will be again) drug addicts. Everything from marijuana to heroin to crack and methamphetamine. The drugs provide them with a "world" where they can be high and empowered and happy - as opposed to living in their sober "normal" selves which are depressed, afraid, self-damaging and awful. The use of drugs makes their "normal" life even worse, as they lose family and friends, and their perceived need for the release of drugs increases. These people live in a speedily descending spiral. And they are very seldom looking to be rehabilitated; they are looking for drugs. You found that you have nothing to offer them because they were looking for right-now euphoria rather than someday salvation. Dave Harm expressed it perfectly, I think. He made his own personal decision (12 years ago) to be sober, and he still makes that decision every day. Your essay is well expressed as a stated closure on a bad situation. Well done.

Reviewed by Rebecca Burns 7/2/2006
wow, that was intense and full of feeling.
Reviewed by Marguerite Lemoine 5/7/2006
Thanks for sharing this beautiful article - Could not have said it as well but I know it will help some victims as well as those who love and are effected by these adictions to come to realize that they are loved and they need not do harm to their minds and bodies by finding another god - That they have the only Father God, Son and Holy Spirit (The Trinity) they need to carry them through this Valley Of Tears - Marguerite The Little Flower
Reviewed by Elizabeth Taylor (Reader) 4/8/2006
Good advice and common sense.
The world is in short supply of common sense.
I don't have much patience with people who screw up their lives and then expect to be rehabilitated with charity, only to screw up again and again and again. Anyone who would waste their lives on something that has no redeeming value, can stay in their gutter. The rest of us have a life to live and being another crutch for those who can't hold themselves together isn't my idea of common sense.


Reviewed by Dave Harm 4/8/2006
Excellent letter... as an addict, I know how easily it is to manipulate the ones you "love" into your addiction and fantasy world.

In recovery, bridges still haven't been rebuilt even though I've been sober for close to 12 years. I hold no bitterness nor anger - I do understand their uncertainty. But someday, in God's time, we will be reunited and I can wait. The only thing I can do is be clean and sober, when that time comes.

For every co-dependent, don't think about it, don't believe the stories - run! It's your life and health that you should be concerned with - not theirs. They made their choice - now it's time to make yours...

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