The original where my parents met was on east 126 street closer to where my father lived in Harlem. This part of Harlem was called Spanish Harlem because from 1917, it was where the Puerto Ricans settled after having been granted citizenship. Parenthetically the Broadway location became the home of the “mambo” and the now famous Salsa then led by the Cubans, especially Tito Puente. We later saw his son perform in Fort Myers. I can easily see why the first twenty years of my life was dominated and fixated on music, big bands and the sound of dance music. www.bariefez-barringten.com'>http://www.bariefez-barringten.com">www.bariefez-barringten.com
By Barie Fez-Barringten
The original Palladium where my parents met was on east 126 street closer to where my father lived in Harlem. This part of Harlem was called Spanish Harlem because from 1917 it was where the Puerto Ricans settled after having been granted citizenship. Parenthetically the Broadway location became the home of the “mambo” and the now famous Salsa then led by the Cubans, especially Tito Puente. We later saw his son perform in Fort Myers. I can easily see why the first twenty years of my life was dominated and fixated on music, big bands and the sound of dance music.
Yet it was these time, these metaphors and these media events that sidetracked most away form their tumults, precious anomie’s and faulty education. It kept most humming and whistling agreement to the solutions the society and government presented and led most to endure the work, social displacement and shelving of there dreams for the actual hard work it would take to rebuild America’s industry, economy and values. They would not be what they had been. Women worked and fought the war; Indians died defending America’s freedoms. There would be neither place for discrimination nor intolerance for equality. Indeed, Americans met at places like the Palladium to be overwhelmed and succumb to someone else’s dream and be carried through these times.
As the story goes my parents had been dating and travelling on the train between Manhatten and Brooklyn when they both concluded that it would be more economical and expeditious to marry and save the carfare and two rentals. The dance hall was not "Roseland" but its nearby competitor. I do not remember its' name. It is mentioned in songs by Sarah Vaughn and Count Basie and could be a name like “concordia...”Their meeting and honeymoon seem to be the most romantic thing that ever happened to them There is practically nothing I can remember about there early years that smacks of love, affection, romance or happiness. I’m sure it must have been there, except I can’t recall.
My Parents were married May 14, 1936, the same month as both their births. I know the date, because, aside from all major Holidays and our birthdays, we, too, celebrated their wedding Anniversary.
There are photographs, which my mother would show us of them in Lake Placid on their honeymoon. They were models of the times; well-dressed fashionable and very beatiful! Wearing furs, hats, gloves, suits, dresses, stockings, etc. Looking very slims and fit.
The winter sports center of Lake Placid was twice the proud host of the Winter Olympics, lies thirty miles west of I-87 on Hwy-73. In winter there's thrilling alpine skiing at imposing Whiteface Mountain and all manner of Nordic disciplines at Mount Van Hoevenberg, and in summer which is when they were there, you can watch luge athletes practice on refrigerated runs, freestyle skiers somersaulting off dry slopes into swimming pools, and top amateur ice hockey games.
They could breathe the balsamic air and smell the woods, to paddle and swim the waters, to glide or clomp across the snow, to loaf, read and sleep, to walk, hike, and explore. And, dine at their leisure.
There was also the hustle and bustle of Lake Placid. The Olympic Village's Main Street is lined with shops, Adirondack goods, and plenty of nightlife. In and around the mountain town is the Olympic Venues. including bobsled and toboggan rides, Olympic tours, and ice skating - to name a few. Because of his business my father often returned to the Adirondack and Lake Placid.
They had so much in common and yet were such opposites. They were unable to reconcile their differences and my father was determined eventually to make another life and develop his business at the same time.
My mother was an idealist while my father a pragmatist.
My Mom drew lines in the sand and was Satan’s worst enemy.
My Dad was oblivious. He was learning, but, very slowly!
The financial times were difficult when they first got married, but only improved as time went on. It was not money or environmental stress. They both believed in the “work ethic”
My parents made a great team; my father was generous, kind, friendly and yielding. He was a great strategist and wise in his business dealings. My mother was Teutonic and principled. She knew right from wrong. With God’s love. Patience, tolerance and faith together God’s blessings would have bought them the love and peace which only comes from a loving relationship with God. My parents both found God and His will separately.
My mother, may she rest in peace, always wanted my father to be there more for me; there was not, in her eyes, enough of my father for me; and, I was too much for her. She needed help and did not get it! All those early years she was crying out.
I thank God that in my late teens, I did realize this for her sake and mine. I could comfort her and make up for what we did not get and I could seek the help she knew I needed.
My parents wanted their children to have what they did not have and to be different and better than they were. They did not want for us to follow them or be like them. In my judgement my mother was called to be a parent. My father was not. My father had many other positive attributes and he supported my mother and us. He even cared about us feeling good. My mother was very upset because she realized that her children needed two parents. She was not called to be both mother and father. She was frustrated that my father was not the kind of parent I needed. My mother had 3 brothers and my father had two sisters and nine brothers. My dad just wanted to provide what he did not have, while my mother wanted to parent us. She realized we need nurturing, education, and care. To deal to learn how to be a man. She felt that all my father wanted to do is to have a good time. My father did not listen and no one cared nor credited her for her struggle. I did. I recognized this was what I needed and what upset her. All I could do is love and care for her and try to calm her by demonstrating I found what was needed elsewhere. Thanks to God!I was blessed by God to have such love in my life!
It never seemed my parents appreciated that I had a degree from either Pratt of Yale. Perhaps it was because they knew how bad a student I had been in my early child hood.
I lost Objective of gaining Independence and being appreciated by my parents to reward and support me by helping me get clients and customers. They did not.
I gave up.
Economy, marriage to Christina with no second income made succeeding professionally impossible.