Too often, many religious people get offended at people who are secular or don’t understand us. We can find common ground though, and sometimes on the most surprising issues. My husband and I discovered we had a lot in common with our friend who is a Jehovah’s Witness. We are adamantly secular, (I actually consider myself an agnostic pantheist-spiritual atheist) but found that our terminology was the only thing different when describing our world views.
My husband and I both think something is wrong here on earth. We all believe war is ALWAYS wrong, that you should not pledge your allegiance to your government, (we have more free-thinking political views too, and believe government is inherently evil.) My husband and I think that Native Americans had the right idea living in harmony with nature. We hate that their culture was destroyed and now believe humans are completely out of harmony with nature and all other animals are. We don’t really celebrate holidays, because honestly Christmas makes us uncomfortable, and for the others, we are just lazy. We do like Halloween though…Yes; we are unconventional artist types….
We believe in not judging others, and in not doing things to hurt other people in any way. I follow the golden rule, because it is right, and even if I am a skeptic I think Karma could be possible. I think a lot of things are possible, not just one version of reality. I tend to be into sci-fi. It is actually kind of interesting that to me, my unbelief is actually belief in endless possibilities.
The only difference in our friend’s belief is that she believes in the Christian God, and we are unsure about the nature of reality of this vast universe. She believes the explanation for the problems of the world is Satan, and we believe it is human nature and people choosing the “dark.” (Greed, selfishness, power etc) We surprisingly had the same beliefs about the world, just different beliefs about God. I don’t know if there is a god or not, but I know what is moral and right and what is not. She doesn’t celebrate holidays at all, especially not Halloween. Everything else was right on target though, and we were surprised.
She then asked what my beliefs were and I told her I was a pantheist, and she didn’t know what it was. I blushed and told her it is a spiritual kind of atheism, expecting her to view me differently. She surprisingly didn’t judge me and found it interesting that we marvel at the wonders that science unfolds. She knew we were nice people so the untrue stereotype that atheists don’t have morals had never crossed her mind. I told her I’m not a scientific person but I think science holds the secrets I wish to find and that honestly, I don’t want to know the true nature of reality ever. I don’t think I have the capability to understand it as a human, or I will be disappointed and be like, “That’s it.”
Aren’t there are really only two “forces” anyway? There are those who serve the light and those who serve the dark. Those who choose good will and those who choose to hurt others. Secular people believe this “light” or “dark” is found within and use the term metaphorically. Using science to explain human behavior, and knowing that people either choose to be selfish, ignorant, or hurtful on there own. Often time’s mental illnesses are to blame. However, the responsibility is not placed on anything that can not be explained by science or rationale. The religious may rely on the bible or other religious texts to explain these problems. We can agree however not on how we believe the problem is caused, but rather on the real issue- that there are problems in the world.
Does it really matter if we agree on the cause? Isn’t it better to find a solution? Instead we should use what we have in common to help make the world better. Wouldn’t it make more sense to find practical solution to conquer the common problems of poverty, violence, war, abuse, and the various other problems that plague the world rather than being concerned with what separates us? We need to come together and make a difference.
It took me a while to accept myself and get over the fear of hell after being raised Catholic. I “came out” publicly to the surprise of my husband just a few days ago when asked what my religious preference is. I said “Umm….Atheist, (to which the person looked shocked) and I said “No, we are not religious at all.”
I mean not unless you account for nature’s wondrous beauty or how we are all part of the universe and that the fact we are hear in itself is amazing. I am open to the possibility of God, but I don’t think if there is a God that it is a “he” or even a human being. If it had to be a human being, I would first say she.”
I must say the possiblility of god and heaven or hell is not completely irradiated, but it does sound really irrational to me personally. After all we are animals, and all animals die so it makes sense we would just go back into the earth, or there are various other possibilities I have thought of- much to many to list without writing a 500 page book though….
As a child I grew up Catholic, and maybe because I am a writer; I always interpreted the bible metaphorically. I always saw Satan as a metaphor for the darkness that lurks in the hearts of mankind, never an actual being. That is my interpretation, and I didn’t choose to think of religion as a metaphor, and was surprised to discover as an adult when I met my husband that I was according to him- an atheist.
As a very young child I found religion extremely frightening, in fact the most frightening thing I had ever witnessed. I remember sitting in a pew and looking around thinking that everyone looked like they were in a trance. Now you can say that was my naïve child view, but since that day; I always said “my church is outside” and I thought that if there was a god it was a great artist who created the beauty of the world and the universe. I wanted to be out in nature rather in some building created by men.
Because I found religion scary and still do, I can’t be converted, so please don’t try. I know some people find comfort in religion and if it makes them happy then great as long as they don’t tell me I’m going to hell for not being into it. If they want to silently pray for me without telling me that is fine. I have no problem with people sending positive vibes.
I think we all have different paths that could lead to the same spiritual outcome. It is hard to explain to people of faith but I think there are many paths, because they believe in one thing, and I just don’t have the ability to just believe one thing. Then when I start explaining about all the possibilities sometimes people just can’t understand and think I’m crazy or even worse- they get offended. So unless I am among friends, or I am asked I won’t elaborate. I don’t like hurting people or making them upset.
I think believing is something that is in you or not in you. I think it is a struggle for a lot of people and that there are a lot of people like me but they are silently suffering. I was for a while. The reason is because the “Dreaded A word has a stigma attached to it.” Honestly, saying it makes my heart skip a beat at times when using it to describe myself. I grew up with the misconception of what that word meant too. I don’t think me or my husband or my atheist friends fit the stereotype of the connation of that word. In fact, I have never met anyone that does. We are normal. We are very moral and sometimes extending our morals into unconventional ways.
For example, my husband and I decided not to have children for moral reasons. I think a lot of religious people would think that is weird or even wrong, but because of my view of the world I think it would be inhumane. I also have bad genes so it is another bad reason for me to have kids. It is hard for other people to understand this choice, but it comes from strong moral convictions just different from their own. I would never push my morals on anyone else though. I am not going judge people that choose to have kids as being morally wrong. Just because my morals work for me, doesn’t mean they should work for everyone.
I just wish people would be more accepting about mine. It can be difficult to explain the reasons for not having kids. I have just started saying I can’t have any, which is true because I made the difficult decision to make it so I couldn’t. When I say that it is difficult, I mean the first time I ever considered having kids was before I made it so I couldn’t. I thought about it for over a year intensely. I have medical reasons, as well moral reasons for my decision. However, I do plan to adopt a child in the future. I would love to help out someone who is already here. People probably think these choices are weird, but they make sense to me.
It sickens me when people try to push their morals on others. Not everyone’s life is the same. One area where people are really vocal is the anti-gay movement. I must say sadly, many people use their religions to hate, most recently against homosexuals. It is hard to be on the outside looking in, knowing that hatred should not be infused with religion. Why can’t people see that? Regardless of whether you support gay rights or not, what gives us the right to judge other people, and harass them? If people don’t agree with them, why can’t they just leave them alone? Or if they must- pray for them instead of creating a hate-filled environment if you think they are doing something wrong.
It is hard to understand people who judge others so harshly, especially when it has no direct effect on their own lives. It is baffling to see people with hate in their hearts in the name of God. That is not how I learned about God as a child.
While perusing the internet I have stumbled upon religious websites titled “Atheists Burn in Hell” or those with anti-gay hatred. When did God say it was okay to hate? As a secular individual seeing these kinds of things fuses my secular views even further, and my tolerance level for those kinds of world views is very low. The reason is not because what these people believe, it is because they choose to hate.
I do realize not all religious people hate, and those are the people who are true to their religion. They are the ones who serve the light along with- surprise some secular people who have very high moral standards as well. I have no problem with believers, just believers who use their beliefs to hate, and that is the true abomination.
I wish people would wake up and see we are all brothers and sisters and we are meant to live in peace and harmony with the universe. As long as it doesn’t harm yourself or others, people should be allowed to live the way they want.
Take care, thanks for reading, and I do feel the need to say I am still uncomfortable with using the “dreaded A word” to describe myself and honestly every time I mention it I expect to get backlash. I am prepared for this, and those who feel the need to backlash, I want you to take into consideration that I was very respectful in this essay, and you should be too. My goal is to get people to think for themselves not to be intolerant or disrespectful. Keep in mind, I also know the “nice” condescending way that people try to get you to be someone you are not. You are not going to change me, and any comments or messages of either kind of disrespect will be promptly deleted. Thank you for your respect and consideration. Again, thanks for reading!
Sincerely,
-P
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