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David Arthur Walters

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Short Stories
· I Was A Frustrated Newspaper Columnist

· I Was A Crack Adding Machine Operator

· Whom God Hears

· On The Immortal Story

· The Honor System for Parolees

· Doctor Sagwell

· My Career as a Manhattan Liquor Inspector

· The Underbed

· The First Time I Ran Away From Home

· Kimberly Reagan Sanchez Immigrates


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· A Meaningful Life

· Fear and Love and Doom

· Introduction To The Word God

· Boredom Can Kill

· The Great Hypocrisy of Office

· Universal Reasoning

· Spinoza's God

· Tolerance

· The Poetic Genius of William Blake

· Notes on Why Freedom


Poetry
· Mother Charlotte Watches Over Us Still

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· Certainly Heroes Must Exist

· What Hath God Wrought?

· Shekhinah

· Derridada

· St. Louis Arch

· Follow Your Heart

· My Cold Dutch Wife

· Antonia

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News
· Press Trial of Miami Beach Code Compliance

· Black & White Distinctions in South Beach

· Black Week Scare Lingers in Miami Beach

· Miami Beach Mayor Obscene Propaganda Organ

· Happy Hour at Hiro's South Beach

· Rename Arthur Godrey Road Jackie Mason Boulevard

· Notice of Incompetence

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Euthanasia recommended for Social Security

2/4/2005 6:40:00 AM

by David Arthur Walters


Neocon claims euthanasia is a true conservative value.

Washington, D.C.
Friday, February 04, 2005  6:40:00 AM

Euthanasia will save the Social Security system, according to George Hamler, spokesman for the Neoconservative Anthropological Association. He identified euthanasia as "a true conservative practice." 

Mr. Hamler said that reverting to the primitive custom of killing feeble people who would otherwise be a burden on society would not only save the Social Security system from bankruptcy but would also result in surpluses adequate enough to increase benefits and reduce the retirement age to 45.

"We must overcome our narcissistic fear of death," said Mr. Hamler, "and recognize death as nature's way of rejuvenating our society, so that it may become young and strong again."

Mr. Hamler recommended that all people over 40 be tested annually. Anyone who could not carry their own weight would be euthanized by the Social Security Administration.  

He said that the more ethical primitive groups stoned or choked feeble people to death instead of leaving them in the bush to die and to be eaten by animals. 

"People once welcomed the good death. They thanked their relatives, in advance, for killing them on the appointed day. Today it is best, however, to have the Social Security Administration handle the injections or gassing process, to make sure there is no suffering and that death be a celebration for the social good." 

 

 


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