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As If
by
Missy Cross
Friday, August 10, 2007
Rated "PG" by the Author.
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An ode to my years in a Methodist congregation. These images came to me with the voice of a valley girl in my ear. Sublime... blasphemous... or just plain ridiculous?
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As If
As if God is going to stride across
A dusty diamond that reeks of futility
Spitting tobacco and scratching his cap
To smack me upside the head and yell,
“Ya f.*$ed up, I’m takin’ you out!”
As if God is going to stalk around,
Lightly tapping a willow cane
Against a crisp pair of steely breeches
To haul me out to the woodshed, muttering,
“This will teach you…”
As if God is going to burst forth
Purple veins popping at his temple,
Snapping a slithering patent belt
To exorcise my latest sins, bellowing,
“I have told you a thousand times…”
As if God is going to fly out
Of a melancholy billboard,
Wagging a finger and sporting a scowl
To solicit the likes of me, scolding,
“Thou shalt not…”
Yea, right.
As if…
And yet…
Reverend Olson’s Bible broods darkly
Dreaming of the ancient plagues
Scorning these pampered agnostics,
Simpering its secrets to a shadowy bookshelf...
And at this eleventh hour
Pulling up a chair, chin in fist,
To bear witness to my nightmares
And savor the whispers of the damned.
© 2007 Melissa Cross. All rights reserved. No part of this piece may be reproduced without the express permission of the author.
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| Reviewed by Lloyd Graham |
10/7/2007 |
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Thank God for Missy, Amen.
<3
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| Reviewed by Lynn Barry |
8/28/2007 |
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| This is a powerful piece of work. HUGS |
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| Reviewed by Jerry Engler |
8/16/2007 |
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| Good thoughts, good writing. I even think you got it right about God both times, and in doing so, pointed out what is incorrect about some of our thinking. God would not have us suffer as we do for much of what we do wrong, and he aptly warns us of the consequences of the things we do, even down to the dreaded "the wages of sin is death." What would he be giving us free will if didn't also give us fair warning? What kind of father would I have been if I hadn't warned my child that sticking himself in the eye might hurt?...Jerry |
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| Reviewed by George Carroll |
8/11/2007 |
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| You can do what you want, you were given free will. But there'll be a day of reckoning believe it or not. Great spoof |
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| Reviewed by Missy Cross |
8/11/2007 |
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Fee, I tend to be of the same mind... but can't deny that late at night those old strictures still haunt me sometimes. "Pampered agnostic" was strictly how I thought the Bible I was given might be looking at me, since I am richly spoiled by my family and friends (and very lucky to be so). As always, it is a great pleasure and honor to have you stop by and comment! -- Missy
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| Reviewed by Felix Perry |
8/11/2007 |
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Well I am Agnostic but I wouldn't consider myeself pampered just more aware of the reality of religion's history, regardless this is one fantastic write. The format, the subject matter, the innovative way you look at God...all come together in this one and just have to say, I usually try to avoid religiious writes but so glad I stopped to read this one. Well done
Fee |
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| Reviewed by Cedric III |
8/10/2007 |
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i like the way the ending two stanzas counter-balance the rest of the piece.
sometimes i think people paint god all wrong.
someone tried to paint him all big and scary to me but well... when you tell me hes my father i immediately think of my dad who is always drunk and wonderfully singing and i wonder how god could be horrid.
i dont think this is blasphemous.
i love your 'as if' attitude
it seems to quietly mock the god they painted you but it also questions and confronts those that did the painting... trying to make them see that maybe their paintbrush is a little out of whack.
i love the way god is made out to be some southern hick out of the beverly hillbillies or something... thats quite a fun light to see god in...
good work!
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