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Clown, Gangster, Clown { for 'Bunny'}
by
Phyllis Jean Green
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Not rated by the Author.
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Currently of the opinion that this is vastly superior to the version I posted previously. Hope so!! Destined to be in Dancing Still, a new chapbook I plan to submit soon. ['All' I gotta do is
make umpteen revisions. Previously published pieces are in need a lot of work! Color me embarrassed!} Anyway. . .wish me luck. Hope you fall for this poem about my brother Bunny. {Eventually metamorphed to 'Al.' But between us, Bunny would always be -- will always be -- Bunny.}
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Clown, Gangster, Clown
In Memoriam
Clarence Alston Dawson, II
1936-1974
The scar that showed started above his left eye,
then scraped a road through hair dark as night.
“Women love it!” he crowed. Wagged
the brow that conspired to meet the one doomed
to arch as if amused and in heat. Espresso eyes
snap, watch out. One second, you’re holding
your stomach, the next, black ice. Going under
the knife five times hadn’t stolen the “Gangster
Look” popular with the Ladies. "Call it a bonus
for being stupid enough to hitch a ride in a bug
to-the-ceiling with other clowns just mustered
out. So long, Texas! Hoo-HA. "Ain’ lived ‘
til a helicopter has landed an inch from your nose.
WHUPWHUPWHUPWHUP" “Lucky, quacks
insist." “Hem-hem-haw.” “It is complicated,
son.” Big suck on the pipe. “Frontal lobe controls
emotions, muttermutt–.. . .bit battered as a child?” . .
200 IQ, you say? Memorized books at three-?
Read upside down? WHUPWHUPWHUPWHUP"
Lasting to 38 was no minor accomplishment.
"Such a great teacher. Unreal clinician. ‘Hell
went wrong–?” If, if, IF everyone had known
it took somersaults, headstands and balancing
on wires – wired – to keep going as if sane.
Probably should have stuck to art. Psychology
so introspective. Talk about a waste.
, , ,see you in every dark little boy.
Flower-stem neck grows stubble, then a beard.
See you pointing a gat. Take THAT ! Take THAT.
Ackackackack ackackack! “Have cat-fights
over me. Best thing ever happened.”
Always made me laugh, Bro.
Always, always, make me laugh.
(c) Phyllis Jean Green, 2007
All Rights Reserved
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| Reviewed by Rose Rideout |
7/25/2007 |
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Phyllis this is a very beautiful touching tribute to your brother, and I have to tell you, you are already a success in any write you do. Thank you so much for sharing.
Rose |
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| Reviewed by E. Richardson |
7/13/2007 |
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Phyllis, you have one of the most unique voices in verse...it flows, it has rhythm, it can get kwirky, be funny, be sad, be sexy...and most of all it is real...
This lovely piece...dedicated to your brother is a good example of that uniquness.
Good luck on that project kiddo. |
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| Reviewed by Elizabeth Price |
7/11/2007 |
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| So sad. Your words brought your brother to life for me. Very touching. Excellent poem. Liz |
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| Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado |
7/11/2007 |
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Great write, Pea; very well penned! BRAVA!
(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in Tx., Karen Lynn. :D |
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| Reviewed by Morning Star |
7/10/2007 |
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Wow outstanding write!!!
Felt the emotions and love throughout
The page Great Job!!
Love Peace and joy many Hugsss to you..Morning Star ( Yolie ) |
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| Reviewed by M.Bennett Hooper (Mikii) |
7/10/2007 |
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| Absolutely outstanding as I am blinded by the excellence of this piece. Author!!! Author!!! I bow to your pen. PLB&G for caring and sharing <Mikii> |
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| Reviewed by Susan Sonnen |
7/10/2007 |
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| You made me wish I'd known him! :) |
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| Reviewed by Tinka Boukes |
7/10/2007 |
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Great offering Pea!!
love Tinka |
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| Reviewed by Felix Perry |
7/10/2007 |
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VEry moving. I could feel your love, respect and admiration along with a ton of love you held for this brother who meant so much to you. Fine tribute for sure.
Fee |
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| Reviewed by Victor Buhagiar (Reader) |
7/10/2007 |
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| Great humor, Phyllis. And a great poem too. Wish you luck with your publication. Victor |
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| Reviewed by George Thompson |
7/10/2007 |
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Reality and humor simutaneously! Great write!
George |
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| Reviewed by Karen Vanderlaan |
7/10/2007 |
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| i love this look at a sweet relationship laced with reality and humor- |
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| Reviewed by Mr. Ed |
7/10/2007 |
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Always made me laugh, Bro.
And that, is a wonderful gift, to be cherished always. And this is a wonderful ode to your 'Bunny.' |
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| Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner |
7/10/2007 |
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The imagery you use, the way you WRITE! Pea!!!
The opening lines,
The scar that showed started above his left eye
then scraped a road through hair dark as night ... BRILLIANT!
A grand introduction to your Bunny. A memorial? If so, you've captured him in loving lines. If not, good on ya: I hope he continues to make you laugh. Well done.
(((HUGS))) and love, Karla. |
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