Declining the Cratered Path
by Julianza (Julie) Kim Shavin
Wednesday, October 06, 2010
Rated "PG" by the Author.
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(Photo by author in Hope, BC, Canada) |
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The long sodden dawns of August
(gray blood of the heart's yawn)
break to bland afternoons.
Deeper in August before it tumbles
to all those coming -embers,
will come the near-meeting
of the moon and Mars,
the world taken with proximity of
two dark rocks beamed on brightly
like a mother upon good sons.
It must be age, that such an event
which, as written, "none who lives
will ever witness again,"
evokes nothing.
Afternoon unto evening evinces a
long Then, the then of your life,
stretching back like a black wake
in starlight, a wake somehow
unconscious or fulsomely slept,
so furled were you
in the lashings of living.
He wrote, whose words you worship
as at a shrine, “how much more
romantic are we, like this, apart,
untangled in the ways of earth,
how perfect we declined that
cratered path, the dull smack
of startling love" – and you know
that he is wise and right.
You think of yourselves in
separate darks,
two crania halo-ed in artificial light,
remitting words through ether,
eyes of soft shadow, each unmoved
by the likes of heavenly bodies
all but kissing, having nothing
on two earth forms that never will,
never must, never wish to,
so intimate are rhey in their
own dying masses
that any body would be jealous
of such – of such's brilliance,
diffidence, dreadlessness,
its pristine earth upon heaven,
its communion like bursting
cormorants in the absolute
perfection that absolute distance
bestows –
from the sodden dawns of August
to the diadems dotting
supernal dusks.
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Julianza, Inkling
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| Reviewed by J'nia Fowler |
10/7/2010 |
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| Easy on the mind. Evocative and eloquent as well. A pleasure to read and of course I can appreciate the picture as well. Thank you. |
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| Reviewed by Chantilly Lace (Reader) |
10/7/2010 |
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| Wonderful writing sweet lady..enjoyed..stay safe and well..Hugss |
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| Reviewed by Paul Judges |
10/7/2010 |
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| Excellent poetry, Julie |
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| Reviewed by Karen Palumbo |
10/6/2010 |
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Very perceptive and overwhelming in emotion, with an inner beauty that ties it all together, masterful...
Be always safe,
Karen |
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| Reviewed by richard cederberg |
10/6/2010 |
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| Reviewed by Gene Williamson |
10/6/2010 |
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I like what you're doing ith your words these days. Notably,
the following:
Afternoon unto evening evinces a
long Then, the then of your life,
stretching back like a black wake
in starlight, a wake somehow
unconscious or fulsomely slept,
so furled were you
in the lashings of living.
-gene.
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| Reviewed by Peter Schlosser (Reader) |
10/6/2010 |
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| This is most excellent Julie. See you've been sharpening that pen of yours. One of your best, for sure. Incredible writing. |
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| Reviewed by Christine Tsen |
10/6/2010 |
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Extraordinary, most creative~
How fabulous is that last stanza!
Best Wishes,
Christine |
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| Reviewed by Felix Perry |
10/6/2010 |
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I bow to your talent, for this is truly a deep and meaningful write that rings out with the voice of the universe. well done Julie.
fee |
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