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I was just ridin’ along in my little red truck
When I had to suddenly swerve to miss the duck!
“Now, what’s that duck doin’ in the middle of the road?
And what’s that hopping behind it? It’s a big ole’ toad!”

As I was a’swervin I ran up onto the curbin’.
It was then I realized, just how very disturbin’-
This all was to the people there at that Texaco station,
‘Cause they was runnin’ and hollerin’ and all of em’ hatin’!

I come to a stop, “EERRK!” and ground er’ down to first-
When I got this notion that I sure had a powerful thirst!
Makin’ sure nothin’ was comin’, I e-a-s-e-d Red to the door
And nonchalantly strutted -into that Texaco store.

Right to the back, where the cold beer was I went,
After makin’ a pit stop at the little room for gents.
Regaining my composure, I hoofed it right on over-
To the cold beer sign that read, “twenty-one and older.”

Lookin’ so fine and blowin’ my mind, the cashier she took my money
And said, “Don’t look now butcha better git outta here honey!”
That crowd’s for sure mad and they’re wantin’ your blood!”
So I took a step back, squishing that big ole’ toad- “BUD!”

That cashier lunged at me ‘cause her pet was dead. Dead on the rug!
.”Whoa, wait a minute. The toad was yours?” “DUH, YEA and the duck!”
“Don’t ya never watch T.V.? They was shooting some more commercials!
Least till you came along and ruint all the rehearsals!”

“Well, I woulda never!” as toward the door I begun to slither.
My chances to escape by then had really begun to wither!
“Hey Leroy! Are you telling that ole’ worn out story-AGIN?”
“Look here. I got more if ya got a few more minutes to spend!”
“GOTCHA!”

I needed a little humor to go with all the BS, so I mixed the 2 and got some humorous BS!