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Heather G B

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Member Since: Apr, 2007

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Shadows Walking, A Novel
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What leads men and women of good will to violate fundamental ethical principles? How do they justify their behavior? Are we all capable of such acts? And if so, how can w..  
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You Own Me"
By Heather G B
Friday, April 20, 2007

Rated "PG13" by the Author.

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I am in the process of writing this.
It is more of a poem, but it tells a story.(as most poems do)
I'm not near finished

You hold me in your tight hand
Not knowing what you do
Don't you realize every word you say
Affects me, what's wrong with you?!
I love the way you touch me
Everytime we we touch
Yet everytime we fought
Each time you told me I was wrong
Or yelled to ensure I knew
That everything you said was right
I couldn't help but love you
How I loved the way you looked at me
Their was so many ways you would
You said if I wanted your love
I'd let you do anything
You deserved it so you should
I'd let you take me away
And have me as you please
He knew he was wrong, he once confessed
But he changed so quickly
He became more stressed
His excuse was I was stupid, naive, and young
Not noticing, my heart was slowly being hung
After all the lies and excuses he made
I forgave him, so restless I became
I'd lay there at night before he'd come home
Crying and hoping for the ring of the phone
Cruel this may sound but I do not care
He stole my life, my hope which was rare
My wish was for this, I'd get that one call
"I'm sorry ma'am, he's dead" but my world would soon fall
He'd come in the room, my wish had then died
I laid there in fear, awaiting the night
For I knew he was mad, I got up in fright
He threw me to the floor, which i was used to by then
I slowly got up as he did it again
This night was no different than any other one
Except for I realized
I was finished, I was done
In the morning he left, just the same as before
Not a word of regret, need I say more?
I needed to leave get away from him now
I wasn't sure when, I didn't care
But how?
No way for him to find me
No proof of where I will be
I needed help had no idea where to find it
Where would I look?, It had to be quick
My past love would sure help me
He knew me so well
But maybe he wouldn't my life was a hell
I had to hide soon, he'll be back
I had to go, I began to pack
Filled with emotion, fear and pain
My heart running and crying
Full of disdain
I ran to the door, only to find
The one person I needed
The only one on my mind
I've been here waiting
Wanting him to come back
Hoping for his love again, anticipating
He said he wouldn't leave
No longer he could live without
My honest love, care, and devout
That's what I'd always be
If you take me away
Far from this life of misery
Make it okay
Help me out, like you used to do
When we were in love, when I used to have you
You promised me love, safety, and life
All he didn't give me, when I was his wife
You said forever, no hurt you would bring
I loved him always, how could it be?
That he hasn't been here
When I needed him most
Through the worst of my years
Through the death of my spirit
And the fall of my tears
My one wish I have had
Every single day
Was for him to come back
That's what I'd pray
Each time I kneeled down to ask the Lord
Get me out of here I begged
Help me escape my own war
I battled myself, each second, each hour
Climbing that endless, horrible tower
It consisted of this
That fought with my heart
Of love, suffering, pain and of loss
I blamed God, not me
For my horrible fate
Never myself, let me translate
In truth it was me, I did not fight
Why must I lie to myself?
To make everything right?
No, no more excuses, I finally saw the light
Standing in front of me, shining so bright
He took me away just as he said
No more lies or deception filling my head
That hole in my heart that has always been there
Is now filled with love, his passion and care
My wish had come true
My prayer had been answered
My life is complete
No longer it suffers
As I thought it would forever
My wish was fulfilled
I thought it would never
He loves me so much
When I look in his eyes
I could just melt with his touch
How can it be? I am treated so well
When my life was destined
As a living hell
I have not seen that man since that one day
Never again I promise to be strong
For when he comes back
He'll convince me I'm wrong
I'm weak, this I know
This is now why I'm scared
As if he never hit me, never abused
I'd fall in his arms, all hurt and bruised
But I know with his help, I'll be all right
I don't have to worry, hope is in sight
A life of happiness we now live
Full of more love I thought I could give
That night, watching the rain, I was alone
When a knock on the door
Broke the silence like stone
In my worst nightmares, this is what happened
Now it was real, no hope to imagine
In one single blow, I was down on the floor
I couldn't believe it, I hadn't won my own war
He dragged me outside
Said to be still
As he threw me in his car, against my own will
As i fought against him, I looked in his eyes
Scared of the future, more terror and lies
As he tied me down, I could barely see
His body, once again, on me forcefully
He said I shouldn't of left, my mistake
I'm sorry, I pleaded, for my lifes sake
He was pulled off by the man of my soul
As I laid there unaware of this deadly toll
The toll this would have on my delicate heart
The game of hide-and-seek
I would perminately play
Waiting for him to be put away
This time he was taken
Sentenced for life
Not for taking my spirit
But two other wives
I was lucky, I suppose, for I am still here
But it might be better, if I didn't live in this fear
I now know I am safe from his attacks
I don't have to hide, safety, my heart no longer lacks
It may seem okay, my life turned out good
But their's still a piece of my heart
He owns it
He should

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Reviewed by Carrie Conners 4/25/2007
I know this private hell. Your words touch me as if I'd written some of them myself. So powerful and relative to me. I also know what it's like to come out of that darkness and into a light that emits hope. Thank you for your words.
Reviewed by Gloria Gay 4/22/2007
Successful as poem or story. Harrowing and heart-wrenching in its truth and the inevitability of a fate set in motion by character that cannot be anything but what it is.

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