Grant definitely has MRSA.  His organs are still threatening to shut down and twice last week he coded, meaning his heart and breathing stopped; the PICU medical team had to work hard to bring him back.  It was one of the scariest things I, as a mother, had ever experienced.

The doctors have him purposely knocked out so he doesn't pull out the tubes and monitors attached to his body.  He looks like he's more dead than alive, but I know he's alive; the monitors tell the tale that his lifesigns are, inded, working.  Small blessings, I suppose.  Yet it doesn't make it any easier on me (or on his father and brother and sister).

I am beyond the point of exhaustion.  I have been the main one keeping family and friends informed of the latest information regarding Grant's health situation and I am lucky if I have gotten more than three hours a sleep a night.  For me to get more than three hours of sleep a night sometimes is nothing but an answer to prayer.

I have been too afraid to leave the hospital, for fear something else might happen to Grant, like when he had his second "Code Blue" on Wednesday; the first one happened on Monday.  One "Code Blue" is bad enough; two is nearly impossible to try to get over.  When you see your child in trouble, you don't forget it for a very long time to come.  I know, especially since I saw my own sister die as a result of a seizure.  She was only two years old and all these years later I can still remember the feeling of fear and helplessness I felt.

I guess that's one reason why I'm not a nurse for fear how I wold be if a patient got into trouble or stopped breathing or their heart stopped beating.  I would probably be an eomtional basketcase!

So far, Grant hasn't had any more problems since his two Code Blues, but I wouldn't push it.  I'm not going to say that he's turned the corner because the truth is, he really hasn't..  His vital signs are still rather unstable; anything could and can still happen.  So I'm not pushing my luck.  I have been on my knees in constant prayer, asking God to spare my baby boy.

So that is the latest.  Not much change.  If anything happens (be it good OR bad), I'll be sure to get back to you; until then, all I can do is hope, wait .... and pray for a miracle for Grant!

~To be continued.~