Excerpt
I was heading to the subway when my one floor down neighbor Morris, approached from nowhere. I call him Morris the Cat because when he yawns and he does incessantly, he opens his mouth wide and meows like a cat. This morning when he opened wide, I was stunned when instead of his normal Meeeooowww, what came out from his mouth was a... excuse me please...a loud fart. I thought I heard wrong until I caught the scent. I hot footed it to the entrance stairs of the subway, found my seat and then replayed what had just occurred. It was then I got the giggles and could not stop. I looked up and all around me, were laughing too. All but the old hag with yellowed eyes and dark spaces where once teeth had been rooted. She stared right at me and that is when I noticed the hairy wart on the tip of her nose. The hair flapping in the air she exhaled had a silent rhythmic beat that was responsible for my tapping along with my fingers. I must have been staring for quite a while because the train pulled back to a halt. When it stopped she walked over to me shaking her arthritic index finger with crud under the nail in my face and threatened,"You will be sorry for laughing at me," then turning on her heel,(broom?) disappeared into the exiting crowd before I could explain my hysterics. It sure put a damper on my day. I mean do witches really exist?