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Rory Cantwell

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Member Since: May, 2012

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The Great Hollywood Double Hustle
by Rory Cantwell   

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Category: 

Humor

Publisher:  Discreet Networks Ltd Type: 
Pages: 

227

Copyright:  Feb 2012 ISBN-13:  9780957184503
Fiction

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A gang of 'A-list' film star look-alikes try to con Hollywood! A romantic comedy crime caper novel with 5 STAR REVIEWS

 

 

 

 

When a gang of film-star look-alikes decide to try and con a Hollywood producer into financing their bogus blockbuster movie, they know it's the biggest gamble of their lives but looking like the biggest flange of film-stars ever assembled to make a movie, has got to help.

'The Great Hollywood Double Hustle' invites you into the curious world of a desperate gang of film-star look-alikes who are prepared to risk everything to escape, what they consider to be, their dysfunctional Doppelgänger fate; one where, in their opinion, they only get the sh*t end of the celebrity stick and not the better end, that is generally nicer to hold.

Prepared to take on the predatory Hollywood producers and unscrupulous agents that stand in their way, they aren’t quite so well prepared, when their financial backer, a low-life porn-producer with an axe to grind against the Hollywood machine, also transpires to be an untrustworthy scumbag who is, by his own admission, “About as reliable as a chocolate teapot at an orgy. Great at getting the party started but two minutes later, everyone just looks like they took a mid-sex dump.” 

It doesn't help the group dynamic that their Brad Pitt look-alike egotistically believes that he is far more attractive than his real star counter-part and even worse, he is probably right and it doesn’t make life easier for any of them that their George Clooney look-alike; a farmers son from the Welsh valleys, looks exactly like the real Hollywood star but unfortunately, can only sound like a farmers son from the Welsh valleys.

For their leader Danny, none of these problems are insurmountable but what scares him most and makes him suffer from, what I shall euphemistically call, an extreme form of 'chocolate-teapot syndrome', is the fact that, if it all goes wrong, they will all go to prison for a very long time or, as George would more descriptively put it, "Be as b*ggered as a sheep on market day, isn’t it boyo?” 

Look no further for your laugh-out-loud beach book this summer, THE GREAT HOLLYWOOD DOUBLE HUSTLE is a laugh-a-minute look-alike winner!


Professional Reviews

When was the last time you read a great movie?
Here's one with "silver screen" written all over it. And starring all your favorite actors.
Well, actually look-alike doubles of your favorite actors. Who are tired of making a measly living getting hired out for mall openings that want Brad Pitt and Julia Roberts on hand, or covering for a star who's relapsed into rehab, or even porn films. But who wouldn't pour money into a film with Pitt, Roberts, Robert De Niro, Danny De Vito, Samuel Jackson and George Clooney in it?
Especially if they couldn't tell the difference between the real stars and Memorex?
What could go wrong with a hustle like that?
Count the ways.
And while you're finding out if this gang of doppelgangers can get the money from the even more crooked Hollywood players and exeunt, you get to watch their antics along the caper, both hiding and flaunting their faux famous personas, setting up the caper in a glitzy S&M/D&B brothel, handling two budding romances and a couple of gay tiffs between Dustin Hoffman and Gene Hackman (or at least it looks that way), and juggling evil producers while avoiding their own melt-down.
And of course, since you're reading a movie, it has a happy ending. But happy for whom?

This is the first novel from film-maker Rory Cantwell, adapted (surprise, surprise) from a script, and it has some newbie rough spots. But that's so beside the point. It will move you along and keep you entertained, and you just know you'll someday get to say, "The Double Hustle? I read the book,"


Author Peter Prasad loves it!
The Great Hollywood Double Hustle
by Rory Cantwell (Goodreads Author)

Peter Prasad's review Oct 25, 12

Huzzah Rory Cantwell. You've penned an exciting read, well executed and based on a star-studded walk of fame premise. Imagine a posse of Hollywood actor look-alikes pulling the caper of the century. A good hustle calls for a pile of loot, lots of twists and turns, two fat marks and and a baddie perched in a pear tree ready to tumble. It's a rumble. Some crash land. Others sail away rotten rich.

Cantwell juggles characters faster than a card shark in a casino. Call it an ensemble piece and reserve a table for ten full-on plus banquet for hoards more, all behind closed doors. When expressed on the silver screen, this rant of personality and attitude will play epic like “The Sting.” Bottom line, will Hollywood take a gamble on a hustle pic? Call Quentin. Get Shorty to tell you.

A Danny De Vito look alike runs the crew and one-liners fall forth fired from a machine gun. Think "Taxi" on steroids or "Oceans Eleven" on crack, pay per view. Imagine Susan Sarandon as your soul mate in a therapy session at a cat house? Peel open GHDH (Great Hollywood Double Hustle) and prepare to hobnob with the A-listers, Brad, Julia, et. al. As a character, Julia shines, radiant with quips, comebacks, and her classic ‘look of pity’ smile. Put it in the deal memo – Rory nailed it!

Imagine lights up in a wax museum and the Hollywood glitterati step out of their nooks blathering a wealth of British accents, and they're all looking at you - part of the party. Later they're coached within the framework of the hussle to bark the spitting image of Yankee slang, all tongue in cheek. Call Nick – there’s an Elvis impersonator in here that only he can do justice.

Get up close and personal with famous actors. Pick a rising star and ride it like a comet all the way to an Oscar party. Invite your fantasies to run rampant. Bilk two proto-producers addicted to the shopping channel and re-runs of classic musicals. Hang a porn producer. Dream of escaping with the love of your life. Sorry, no video footage included.

Over the top? You bet. It’s Tinsel Town, baby, all flickering lights and green screen -- reality went out the window with scene three. So tighten your seat belts and prepare for a bumpy ride. Sure there’s time to escape to the refreshment stand for a bag of popcorn between chapters nine and 16, but hurry back. Elvis is in the building, so bring your blue suede dancing shoes. A riot? A frenzy? Yes, that too. Prepare to read a fantasy-romantic-action-comedy romp rehearsed in a bordello, f-bombs away.

Not suitable for reading to children. A guaranteed giggle for adults. Disclosure: I received a free review proof. Note: Rory...shoot in San Francisco; we have a wax museum. Five stars.




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